Warning: Expect foul language. I often blog when sleep deprived, and even when I'm not sleep deprived I cuss.
Warning the second: TMI often occurs. Read at your own risk. Feel free to laugh at my expense (I know I do!).
Warning the third: I suppose I should just put a general Trigger Warning here. I talk about mental illness (Anxiety, panic disorder, depression, social shit), abuse (rarely), and my fucked up relationship with food. And...other things. Actually, just consider this a general warning: If you might be triggered by things, you probably should read no further.

Tuesday, May 8, 2012


So I'm a volunteer conversation partner for the International Students department, and have become friends with the girl I talk with. She gave me the sweetest birthday card (with a pig on the front because that's my Chinese zodiac symbol) and her little cell phone doll! The doll fits easily in my hand and is currently attached to my cell phone. She's dressed in a ruffly red dress, because red is a good luck colour in China. :D :D I bought myself a geektastic present, but currently this present is ranking up there as the all time sweetest gift I've ever been given. Yay warm fuzzies!
She said she gave me the doll so I wouldn't forget her, which is just extra warm fuzzies :). I haven't figured out anything equally as awesome for her, and I want to! Making friends like her...this is one of the reasons I want to travel the world. She's not so subtly hinted that after I get my Bachelor's I should teach English in China, which would be really super cool. So far in the future! She also thinks I have a good ear for Chinese, of course, for all I know I could be repeating cuss words when she's having me say something lol.
I don't know, I'm just feeling very happy and content right now, so I'm treasuring this moment. Moments like these get me through the bad ones, which makes them doubly wonderful. I take them out and roll them around in my mind when the crazysauce is too strong, and they give me strength. They also make me feel more capable, because if other people believe in me...maybe I really do have what it takes to accomplish my goals. I need this determination, because I'm behind in my school work and have that math placement test to deal with. But if others believe in me, then I can believe in me that much easier. Disappointing others is hard, so it gives me that much more motivation to succeed.
Fighting! Now and forever :)

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