Tom is lucky to be alive.
You know how some people become first time parents and there's like this amazing flowering of personal growth because having a child has pulled them outside of their own minds and you're just like "WOW, you're actually a worthwhile human being! Who knew?!?" Okay, now think of the opposite of that.
He's fucking lucky to be alive. It's a wonder his body wasn't found in a ditch on the way here (here being Kentucky).
I am sympathetic, because some of his behaviour has to do with the shitty relationship he was in before. She was a piece of work...in the bad way. She fucked him up, over, and under. She was also a skunt. BUT...if my brainmath is correct, it's been over two years now. His new wife (the wonderful Wendy who has her own problems from a previous relationship but is a LOT more aware of that) is NOTHING like the old one. Serious upgrade. His family agrees. I would submit that continuing to react to her like she was his ex is a fucking insult.
IN ANY CASE. While some of his reactions are because of the former and I can understand that...there's a line. And he keeps crossing it.
He also is failing at parenting because he can't stop panicking. Here he is with a teething baby in his arms, a crying teething baby, and what is his reaction? YELL. When his wife (who has two much older children and thus experience) asks him to stop yelling? He continues yelling that he's sorry, he's not mad, he just doesn't know what to do. At which point she tells him AGAIN to stop yelling. Somehow he can't seem to clue in that a baby doesn't understand that he's not yelling because he's mad, a baby just knows that she's in pain and now her daddy is being LOUD AND YELLY. He also can't understand why his defensive behaviour and inability to take constructive criticism might piss wifey off. Tempers fray. Muchly. and now we segue.
I was asked to tag along so I could help Tom bring home malted shakes for everyone. Fine. His adorkable niece ends up tagging along. Great. He goes around supposedly making a list of what malts people want so he's all organized (theoretically). Reasonable. He keeps repeatedly asking me if I'm going and when I say "sure" snaps at me to get ready to go...repeat this step over a period of twenty minutes to half an hour. Eyetwitch. Niece and I have been goofing off and harassing each other all day, he asks us to cut it out in the car, as this is a reasonable request we comply. We get to the store and get in line. He has forgotten the list in the car. Niece and I step aside and goof off (she was bopping my nose and trying to keep me from bopping hers). He comes back in and orders. Great. We continue goofing off. He bites our fucking heads off. At this point I am thinking "okay, that's legit, I can understand how the immaturity would get annoying. I will accept this even though his tone is completely out of line." He screws up his order. People get in line behind us. He screws up his order again. And again. And again. We (niece and I) try to help keep him calm and figuring out the order. This is not a rewarding experience. After umpteen order changes (I felt so bad for the guys working and the people in line behind him) we finally end up with an 8 malt order. 5 chocolate, 2 cherry, and a cookie dough. If you couldn't guess I KEPT HEARING THIS FUCKING ORDER. While talking to us he keeps screwing up what's in his order. So when the guy says "Here's cookie dough and 2 chocolate" and tom responds with a comment that sound an awful lot like he thinks that's all the chocolate he's getting I let loose with a flippant and dramatic "BUT WAIT, there's more!" He starts going off on me, and as it seems like it has to do with the order takers I think it's reasonable. So I politely say that I'm sorry, that's not what I intended I just meant that there were more chocolate malts coming. HE FLIPS THE FUCK OUT AND ORDERS ME TO GO STAND OUTSIDE AND WAIT BY HIS CAR. He's six fucking years older than me. I won't let my own MOTHER talk to me in that tone, and she went through three days of labour for me! This does not fucking fly. I don't know if my eye was twitching, but I must have had a murderous gleam in my eye as I stared him down. I think I said something like "Oh, WE can TAKE this outside." He starts apologizing and trying to blame his alcoholic consumption of the night before, or the fact that his wife is cranky (because he wouldn't stop fucking yelling around their teething and vomiting 6 month old baby), or that they didn't get enough sleep OR OR OR. All that's going through my head is how many times he has lashed out at me over the past month and apologized for it. People don't realize it, but I have a pretty potent temper. I made the decision to leave before I lost my shit in public. As I turn and go towards the door he says "No, you don't have to wait outside." I informed him that I thought it would be a good idea and leave to go pace behind the car. I think it made him uncomfortable because he ended up bringing his keys out to the car. When he and Niece come out with the order he apologizes, stating it's nothing personal. "It never is," I reply. I also ratted him out to his wife (and feel no guilt about that) and he apologized again.
I should add that the man does have PTSD. Which is why I have endured a LOT more bullshit from him than I would normally consider acceptable. A LOT. Because the asshole thinks it's okay to dish out teasing and shit on me, but if I reciprocate (or, heaven forbid, aid his WIFE in teasing or shenanigans) he flips the fuck out. I keep telling him "Don't dish it if you can't take it" and he keeps insisting he can.
Bullshit.
You can just IMAGINE how much I'm looking forward to the trip back :/
Showing posts with label RAGE. Show all posts
Showing posts with label RAGE. Show all posts
Sunday, July 14, 2013
Friday, July 13, 2012
My beliefs
I'm a Christian. No quibbling for me. It's straight up what I am. No particular denomination, and yes the Bible is my roadmap. I've had more awkwardness coming out as a Christian to friends (yes, I am using that word humourously) than coming out as polyamorous. I come out as poly and interesting convos happen. I "come out" as Christian (c'mon people, I'm pretty obvious about it. y'know, reading the Bible, prayer, "I'm a ComeDiest, I believe there is a God and he's laughing at us") and it's "Oh. I'm not."
So? I'm pretty aware of these things. It's kind of obvious when you make appeals to the Goddess or talk about seeing selkies or what have you that we maybe, just maybe, MIGHT have differing belief systems. So what? Who gives a flying fuck? It's not like I hid the fact that I *gasp* happen to technically fall under the "majority" category when it comes to religion. Seriously. It's pretty obvious. I straight up say it. Just because I cuss and realize that there are more things in heaven and earth blah blah blah, none of that means that I'm lying when I show in so many different ways that I am, in fact, a Christian. So why the awkwardness when I tell you? It's like I've told you I have an STD. It's like...now that I've told you I'm a Christian...what? I'm magically going to change into a different person? The fact that it came up in conversation means I'm suddenly a member of Westboro?
Then people tell me there's no prejudice against Christians. Fuck you. Seriously. Go fuck yourself with a six foot, jagged, rusty, cast iron pole. Because that prejudice fucking exists. Remember how I'm the other? Yeah, in most circumstances being Christian makes me the other too. And where every other belief system is shown respect because it's the politically correct thing to do...It's OKAY to tell me that I'm not allowed to believe that. It's OKAY to heckle me when all I've said in response to a question is "Christian". I've not shoveled out hate, I've just been honest about who I am and what I believe. I haven't pushed it on anybody, my relationship with God is very personal and private-not something I share the details of. And that's enough to throw all the rules in our lovely little politically correct subcultures right out the window. Because Christians are fair game. It's not PERSONAL. Just like when someone calls you a faggot, a heathen, a nigger, a chink. It's not PERSONAL when someone takes one of the most personal things about you and starts blasting you about it. It's not PERSONAL when we've gotten along really well, laughing and joking, but suddenly I'm not human. That's the only conclusion I can draw from the way you're choosing to treat me, to put words in my mouth. You call my beliefs hateful, when I have been nothing but supportive and loving to you throughout all your bullshit. Yeah, there are hateful people out there who claim the title of "Christian". I don't deny it. But why treat ME like shit when I. AM. NOT. ONE. OF. THEM. I never have been.
I just...
Gack.
I had the "I'm not" convo with an online friend the other day. It was relevant to the topic at hand. It bothered me. We'd been having a fun little convo, but the minute I used the "C" word...the conversation just stopped. Then I read a blog post by a guy who is basically dealing with the exact opposite situation (not a believer, surrounded by believers who can't seem to accept that). His experiences...just brought all this shit to the front of my mind. I empathize with him, but I don't know how to express it without getting the usual disbelieving response. I mean...
I understand. Christianity is (technically, considering how many vastly different denominations there are...) the religion of the majority. If I remember my census numbers correctly it was something like three quarters of the population. I understand that. But you know what? Christians don't like me. My sexual orientation and lifestyle do NOT fit what mainstream Christianity says is okay. I may not tell them, but they know I'm odd. Even before I knew that I was anything other than asexual they didn't like me. I make Christians uncomfortable for some reason. So, by default, the vast majority of my friends are not Christians. They tend towards the (self-identified) pagan side. My circles are not Christian. My subcultures are (generally) not Christian. While the belief system I technically fall under might be the majority in the general population, I am the minority in my cultures.
I don't even know what I'm rambling about anymore. I just felt...His post just reminded me of all the shit that's been shoveled on my head for not towing the party line and keeping to my beliefs. Because he seems to be going through the same thing, only opposite. He's a hetero, cisgender, monogamous, male who has identified as "not Christian". Oh, and he was raised Catholic, which with my "cult spin-off of the Pentecostal church" is pretty much as different as you can get.
I can't sleep and feel I am losing whatever coherence I had, so g'nite. Or morning actually. And not barely. It's really REALLY morning.
So? I'm pretty aware of these things. It's kind of obvious when you make appeals to the Goddess or talk about seeing selkies or what have you that we maybe, just maybe, MIGHT have differing belief systems. So what? Who gives a flying fuck? It's not like I hid the fact that I *gasp* happen to technically fall under the "majority" category when it comes to religion. Seriously. It's pretty obvious. I straight up say it. Just because I cuss and realize that there are more things in heaven and earth blah blah blah, none of that means that I'm lying when I show in so many different ways that I am, in fact, a Christian. So why the awkwardness when I tell you? It's like I've told you I have an STD. It's like...now that I've told you I'm a Christian...what? I'm magically going to change into a different person? The fact that it came up in conversation means I'm suddenly a member of Westboro?
Then people tell me there's no prejudice against Christians. Fuck you. Seriously. Go fuck yourself with a six foot, jagged, rusty, cast iron pole. Because that prejudice fucking exists. Remember how I'm the other? Yeah, in most circumstances being Christian makes me the other too. And where every other belief system is shown respect because it's the politically correct thing to do...It's OKAY to tell me that I'm not allowed to believe that. It's OKAY to heckle me when all I've said in response to a question is "Christian". I've not shoveled out hate, I've just been honest about who I am and what I believe. I haven't pushed it on anybody, my relationship with God is very personal and private-not something I share the details of. And that's enough to throw all the rules in our lovely little politically correct subcultures right out the window. Because Christians are fair game. It's not PERSONAL. Just like when someone calls you a faggot, a heathen, a nigger, a chink. It's not PERSONAL when someone takes one of the most personal things about you and starts blasting you about it. It's not PERSONAL when we've gotten along really well, laughing and joking, but suddenly I'm not human. That's the only conclusion I can draw from the way you're choosing to treat me, to put words in my mouth. You call my beliefs hateful, when I have been nothing but supportive and loving to you throughout all your bullshit. Yeah, there are hateful people out there who claim the title of "Christian". I don't deny it. But why treat ME like shit when I. AM. NOT. ONE. OF. THEM. I never have been.
I just...
Gack.
I had the "I'm not" convo with an online friend the other day. It was relevant to the topic at hand. It bothered me. We'd been having a fun little convo, but the minute I used the "C" word...the conversation just stopped. Then I read a blog post by a guy who is basically dealing with the exact opposite situation (not a believer, surrounded by believers who can't seem to accept that). His experiences...just brought all this shit to the front of my mind. I empathize with him, but I don't know how to express it without getting the usual disbelieving response. I mean...
I understand. Christianity is (technically, considering how many vastly different denominations there are...) the religion of the majority. If I remember my census numbers correctly it was something like three quarters of the population. I understand that. But you know what? Christians don't like me. My sexual orientation and lifestyle do NOT fit what mainstream Christianity says is okay. I may not tell them, but they know I'm odd. Even before I knew that I was anything other than asexual they didn't like me. I make Christians uncomfortable for some reason. So, by default, the vast majority of my friends are not Christians. They tend towards the (self-identified) pagan side. My circles are not Christian. My subcultures are (generally) not Christian. While the belief system I technically fall under might be the majority in the general population, I am the minority in my cultures.
I don't even know what I'm rambling about anymore. I just felt...His post just reminded me of all the shit that's been shoveled on my head for not towing the party line and keeping to my beliefs. Because he seems to be going through the same thing, only opposite. He's a hetero, cisgender, monogamous, male who has identified as "not Christian". Oh, and he was raised Catholic, which with my "cult spin-off of the Pentecostal church" is pretty much as different as you can get.
I can't sleep and feel I am losing whatever coherence I had, so g'nite. Or morning actually. And not barely. It's really REALLY morning.
Tuesday, June 26, 2012
GAH.
I love my brother. I love my brother. I love my brother. No, really, I love my brother. Pay no attention to my hands around his neck, I LOVE my fucking jackass of a brother.
I really do love him, and when we get along we get along really well. When we don't get along...Well, it's usually his fault. You can ask my mom if you don't believe me. Just tonight we watched Freedom Writers which was all feel good and I cried (yeah, I'm that girl, and yes, I cry during poignant scenes in action movies too thankyouverymuch). Through a series of conversational threads that I shall not recount because...I don't really feel like it. ANYWAYS. Through a series of conversational threads that I shall not recount, I mentioned to my mother that the roast beef was moldy and since I didn't know what she wanted done with it I put it back in the fridge. I'd meant to tell her when she got home, but forgot until that moment. Now...we keep the lunch meats in tupperware containers so that we can have smaller portions out at a time and freeze the rest. This is not a new phenomenon, we've been doing it for a long time. My brother starts going OFF on me about how I shouldn't have put it in the fridge because now everything in the fridge is going to mold. He starts lecturing me and criticizing me about putting a sealed container back in the fridge. Have I mentioned that my brother has been through all kinds of counseling and seen all sorts of child psychologist specialists? And that he refuses to take medication because there's nothing wrong with him? It's everyone else you see!
So he's being a critical asshole. I ignore him and start talking to my mother about an acquaintance who always wants my brother to come over to do chores for her. I find the woman incredibly annoying, but it's his business so whatever. This time one of things she needs is for him to dig a hole. SERIOUSLY?! She's more able bodied than I am, and I can damn well dig a hole. I admit it, I started mocking her. My brother says she just doesn't do well with practicalities. I say "No, she's just DUMB". He made some diplomatic statement and I laughed and said this was why I would never be a diplomat. My mom laughed with me, at which point my brother starts lecturing me about being less critical. I think my job dropped. My mom's face was a sight to see as well. I just said "Yeah, well, it begins at home buddy".
I freely admit, the snark is strong in this one. I am a very critical person, but I try to turn that into a positive by directing it towards myself most of the time to facilitate self-improvement. The rest of the time I snark to the friends who find it hilarious. No one gets hurt and I don't wallow in my critical nature. The thing is...Hypocrisy bugs me. My brother is one of the biggest hypocrites on the planet, and he's blind to his every fault. I love my brother much better at a distance when I can't catch him lecturing my mother in a completely disrespectful and condescending manner. I do fun things with my brother. We love each other. But if we weren't family I would have nothing to do with the little self-righteous, ignorant, condescending douchebag. But this is the same little douchebag who gave up his room with very little complaint when his big sister's life imploded. So. Family. What are you gonna do? In my case, move far, far away and smile as I think about how nice it will be to miss him.
I really do love him, and when we get along we get along really well. When we don't get along...Well, it's usually his fault. You can ask my mom if you don't believe me. Just tonight we watched Freedom Writers which was all feel good and I cried (yeah, I'm that girl, and yes, I cry during poignant scenes in action movies too thankyouverymuch). Through a series of conversational threads that I shall not recount because...I don't really feel like it. ANYWAYS. Through a series of conversational threads that I shall not recount, I mentioned to my mother that the roast beef was moldy and since I didn't know what she wanted done with it I put it back in the fridge. I'd meant to tell her when she got home, but forgot until that moment. Now...we keep the lunch meats in tupperware containers so that we can have smaller portions out at a time and freeze the rest. This is not a new phenomenon, we've been doing it for a long time. My brother starts going OFF on me about how I shouldn't have put it in the fridge because now everything in the fridge is going to mold. He starts lecturing me and criticizing me about putting a sealed container back in the fridge. Have I mentioned that my brother has been through all kinds of counseling and seen all sorts of child psychologist specialists? And that he refuses to take medication because there's nothing wrong with him? It's everyone else you see!
So he's being a critical asshole. I ignore him and start talking to my mother about an acquaintance who always wants my brother to come over to do chores for her. I find the woman incredibly annoying, but it's his business so whatever. This time one of things she needs is for him to dig a hole. SERIOUSLY?! She's more able bodied than I am, and I can damn well dig a hole. I admit it, I started mocking her. My brother says she just doesn't do well with practicalities. I say "No, she's just DUMB". He made some diplomatic statement and I laughed and said this was why I would never be a diplomat. My mom laughed with me, at which point my brother starts lecturing me about being less critical. I think my job dropped. My mom's face was a sight to see as well. I just said "Yeah, well, it begins at home buddy".
I freely admit, the snark is strong in this one. I am a very critical person, but I try to turn that into a positive by directing it towards myself most of the time to facilitate self-improvement. The rest of the time I snark to the friends who find it hilarious. No one gets hurt and I don't wallow in my critical nature. The thing is...Hypocrisy bugs me. My brother is one of the biggest hypocrites on the planet, and he's blind to his every fault. I love my brother much better at a distance when I can't catch him lecturing my mother in a completely disrespectful and condescending manner. I do fun things with my brother. We love each other. But if we weren't family I would have nothing to do with the little self-righteous, ignorant, condescending douchebag. But this is the same little douchebag who gave up his room with very little complaint when his big sister's life imploded. So. Family. What are you gonna do? In my case, move far, far away and smile as I think about how nice it will be to miss him.
Tuesday, June 12, 2012
Insomnia...ish.
So it's almost two am and I am still awake. I'm pretty coherent too...I think. Of course, I might thing that even if I weren't. That has been known to happen. So just in case I'm going to add the relevant tag. There we go.
So was chatting with a fb friend (who's a RL Friend of a RL Friend...because I've been having that conversation of knowing "real" people on fb and how I don't have any friends in real life because I have too many fb friends...apparently. I found the whole conversation kind of confusing, I'll be honest.) when my head created a conversation that never happened. It's good at those. I wish those conversations would actually happen one of those times, because my brain makes me as articulate as SHIT...wait...that sounded wrong...I meant to imply fantastically articulate...Okay, I guess the relevant tag may indeed be relevant. BUT I DIGRESS. Conversation. That never happened.
I know why people like me. I know why people want to be friends with me. It's because I make them feel good. I don't deliberately try to, it just kind of...happens. People always find things I say amusing (even if I...no, particularly if I don't understand why my comments were hilarious) and often tell me that I brighten their day. I'm cool with that. I dig. I'm hep. I'm happy that I can make other people happy. Good friends are people who return the favour. Who brighten *my* day and make me feel giddyhappy by their very existence. Good Friends are fantastic people who take joy in my joy, creating an infinite circle of "Holy shit, this chick must be on drugs". Well...okay, I kind of do that on my own. One of the very few benefits of wonky brain chemistry. What I'm TRYING to say is that people like me because I make them smile, and I like people who make me smile. People who only hang around as long as I make them feel good, then hit the road when I need some cheering up myself are sucktastick DouchNozzle CockNoggins who have the outright gall to try and claim they're my friend. Clue: You're not a friend, you're a fucking parasite.
I'm so glad that I don't currently have many parasites in my life. I have some truly fantastic friends.
Also, I love them even if they do sing along with that godawful Bieber song when it comes on in the mall...and even when they ask for a ride to the mall and then we're there for THREE AND A HALF FUCKING HOURS. My mom can't say I didn't get my carido today! I went from one end to the other of that mall. I think my girl genes are faulty because I friggin' HATE shopping.
Fighting!
Oh, and if y'all are people and not bots...blink twice for Real and five times for "I'm going to leave a comment because I"m afraid of you"
hehehe. Oh yeah, that tag is *definitely* relevant.
Also, racist douchebags can suck my nonexistent cock. Don't ever think you can harass a woman wearing a hijab in front of me. I am watching and I will FUCK YOU UP. Verbally, physically, legally, or through sheer confusion. If you fuck with a woman because you think she's an easy fucking target THINK AGAIN. I am a loud bitch with a high pain threshhold. Fear me you fucking bigots!
Oh, apparently I need another little tag. I should put a language warning on the top of my blog...
So was chatting with a fb friend (who's a RL Friend of a RL Friend...because I've been having that conversation of knowing "real" people on fb and how I don't have any friends in real life because I have too many fb friends...apparently. I found the whole conversation kind of confusing, I'll be honest.) when my head created a conversation that never happened. It's good at those. I wish those conversations would actually happen one of those times, because my brain makes me as articulate as SHIT...wait...that sounded wrong...I meant to imply fantastically articulate...Okay, I guess the relevant tag may indeed be relevant. BUT I DIGRESS. Conversation. That never happened.
I know why people like me. I know why people want to be friends with me. It's because I make them feel good. I don't deliberately try to, it just kind of...happens. People always find things I say amusing (even if I...no, particularly if I don't understand why my comments were hilarious) and often tell me that I brighten their day. I'm cool with that. I dig. I'm hep. I'm happy that I can make other people happy. Good friends are people who return the favour. Who brighten *my* day and make me feel giddyhappy by their very existence. Good Friends are fantastic people who take joy in my joy, creating an infinite circle of "Holy shit, this chick must be on drugs". Well...okay, I kind of do that on my own. One of the very few benefits of wonky brain chemistry. What I'm TRYING to say is that people like me because I make them smile, and I like people who make me smile. People who only hang around as long as I make them feel good, then hit the road when I need some cheering up myself are sucktastick DouchNozzle CockNoggins who have the outright gall to try and claim they're my friend. Clue: You're not a friend, you're a fucking parasite.
I'm so glad that I don't currently have many parasites in my life. I have some truly fantastic friends.
Also, I love them even if they do sing along with that godawful Bieber song when it comes on in the mall...and even when they ask for a ride to the mall and then we're there for THREE AND A HALF FUCKING HOURS. My mom can't say I didn't get my carido today! I went from one end to the other of that mall. I think my girl genes are faulty because I friggin' HATE shopping.
Fighting!
Oh, and if y'all are people and not bots...blink twice for Real and five times for "I'm going to leave a comment because I"m afraid of you"
hehehe. Oh yeah, that tag is *definitely* relevant.
Also, racist douchebags can suck my nonexistent cock. Don't ever think you can harass a woman wearing a hijab in front of me. I am watching and I will FUCK YOU UP. Verbally, physically, legally, or through sheer confusion. If you fuck with a woman because you think she's an easy fucking target THINK AGAIN. I am a loud bitch with a high pain threshhold. Fear me you fucking bigots!
Oh, apparently I need another little tag. I should put a language warning on the top of my blog...
Sunday, May 13, 2012
The Glories of family
I will not punch my elders. I will not punch my elders. I will not punch my motherfucking elders in their patronizing, know-nothing fucking faces. My step-step-grandfather thought it would be appropriate to interject into a conversation about education that my brother and I were having a comment to the effect that I had wasted my education. Excuse me? Where the fuck do you get off? Mr. Sanctimonious, Ignorant and Ill-informed Super-White Republican. I mean, you don't get much whiter than Swedish-American (Unless it's Norse-American). Who the fuck are you to tell me anything? I can respect that you are a member of the Greatest Generation, but that says nothing for you as an individual. You didn't pursue higher education, and, up until I ended my marriage and pursued education full time, you didn't think I'd wasted a damn thing by going straight into the workforce. I can't say anything to your fucking face because it's a family gathering and I'm supposed to respect my elders. And I will treat you with respect you self-righteous asshole, but this is the last fucking straw. You may never know it, but today you just lost the last shred of respect I had for you. Finito. That's all she wrote. I will be polite to you til the day you die, but that's it. And after you die? No, I will not be one of those nice people who eulogizes you. I will straight up say what an insensitive and ignorant asshole you are. My family may be able to stop me from saying it now, but I will mock your ignorance and idiocy forevermore. I don't care if it's not classy. I don't care if it's not nice. I'm sick to fucking death of being nice, courteous and respectful to people who don't deserve it. You, sir, are a bigot and a fool, and I will do all in my power to avoid becoming you.
Friday, May 4, 2012
Frustration
I don't think I can fully express how completely aggravating, condescending and plain ol' stupid it is to tell someone with a mental illness that people can just "think" themselves out of depression. Yes, if you are merely sad, you can sometimes cheer yourself up. I know this, I've observed it. Hell, I've DONE it. But there's a huge fucking difference between sadness and Major fucking Depressive Disorder, aka REAL depression. The person in question KNOWS I am mentally ill and what those illnesses are. Why? Because I'm completely open about the fact that I have them, and if people want to know details I'm more than willing to share. Why am I so open about it? Because I am sick to death of the way people perceive mental illness, and the fact that as an "invisible" disability it's not really taken seriously. People always say I don't "look" like I have a mental illness. What the hell am I supposed to look like? Maybe if they meet enough people who are not ashamed to admit that they have a chemical imbalance in their brain, maybe then they'll realize that mental illness is not something you can SEE. Yes, sometimes you can see symptoms of mental illness, but that is far different than actually seeing someone's illness.
I spent the last seven years of my life with someone who could not understand why I didn't just "get over it" because it was all in my head. Someone who would get frustrated and mock me for having panic attacks. Why? Because there was no "reason" for them, and they (and I) were stupid. So maybe I'm a little sensitive on the issue. That said...
If you know someone who has a mental illness and has the astounding courage to share that fact with you...DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT tell them to "just get over it", or that it's "mind over matter", or that if they'll just get a better attitude they won't have these problems anymore. Why shouldn't you say things like that? BECAUSE THEY ARE SHITTY THINGS TO SAY. If you broke your leg would you appreciate it if someone laughed at you for having to use crutches, because they twisted their ankle once and didn't need any crutches you wuss? No, you wouldn't. Why? Because there's a huge difference between twisting your ankle and breaking your leg. Just like there is a HUGE difference between you being an angsty teen with a bad attitude who changed your behaviour, and me having a chemical imbalance in my brain that is beyond my control.
FUCK, people, it's not rocket science. Why is this so hard to understand? Seriously. It is beyond my comprehension how people can continually say shit like this when they know better. Does everybody know better? No. But...if you know someone for years, whether friends, lovers or family, and observe their mental illness...and have explained to you what is wrong and why it's happening...and you persist in shitastic comments and attitudes, such as the ones I wrote about above...It is beyond my comprehension how you could be such a shitty person.
Wheaton's Law people. DON'T BE A DICK, YOU FUCKING COCKNOGGIN.
I spent the last seven years of my life with someone who could not understand why I didn't just "get over it" because it was all in my head. Someone who would get frustrated and mock me for having panic attacks. Why? Because there was no "reason" for them, and they (and I) were stupid. So maybe I'm a little sensitive on the issue. That said...
If you know someone who has a mental illness and has the astounding courage to share that fact with you...DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT tell them to "just get over it", or that it's "mind over matter", or that if they'll just get a better attitude they won't have these problems anymore. Why shouldn't you say things like that? BECAUSE THEY ARE SHITTY THINGS TO SAY. If you broke your leg would you appreciate it if someone laughed at you for having to use crutches, because they twisted their ankle once and didn't need any crutches you wuss? No, you wouldn't. Why? Because there's a huge difference between twisting your ankle and breaking your leg. Just like there is a HUGE difference between you being an angsty teen with a bad attitude who changed your behaviour, and me having a chemical imbalance in my brain that is beyond my control.
FUCK, people, it's not rocket science. Why is this so hard to understand? Seriously. It is beyond my comprehension how people can continually say shit like this when they know better. Does everybody know better? No. But...if you know someone for years, whether friends, lovers or family, and observe their mental illness...and have explained to you what is wrong and why it's happening...and you persist in shitastic comments and attitudes, such as the ones I wrote about above...It is beyond my comprehension how you could be such a shitty person.
Wheaton's Law people. DON'T BE A DICK, YOU FUCKING COCKNOGGIN.
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